Holy Bug, Batman!

We settled into our pew on Sunday morning, behind an older gentleman whose name we don't know, but whose back we are quite familiar with. I noticed a little tiny bug crawling on his shoulder, the kind with carapace like steel, the kind you think you can squash with impunity, but which resists with the strength of simply being diamond-hard.

Now, what to do? Smack it and hope for the best? Flick it off his shoulder? Neither option seemed viable. How do you explain cracking an old man on the back when he's just minding his own business in church? Besides, at least I knew where the darn thing was, as long as it stayed on his back. so I opted to let it sit there. Do you know for the entire service it roamed all over his left shoulder and never left?

I listened to the homily, honest I did. It was about...well, you see, the whole point was...Oh, you had to be there.